No Law of Attraction Mindset Necessary

No Law of Attraction Mindset Necessary

I had been meaning to call my internet provider. The last deal I secured came to an end a couple months ago, and I didn’t like that my bill was back up to more than $70 a month for nearly the lowest internet package available.  I needed to call and re-negotiate a better deal.  But I was putting it off.

Negotiating is not my comfortable place.  Quite the opposite.  But I finally called my provider, and after going back and forth with the customer service rep, I ended up with double the internet speed for $20 less per month.  Instead of the offer ending in 3 months like the last few offers, I have the deal locked in for a year, saving me the trouble of going through this again until the end of 2017.

The deal was much better than anything I was expecting.  I was pleasantly surprised and pretty excited about the outcome.

Strive for Aligned Action?

This event caused me to reflect on how I would have interpreted and handled this same event if I were still an avid Law of Attraction fan.  This would have gone quite differently if I were still in my Abrahaze (Abraham-Hicks haze).  The RESULT could have been exactly the same, but there would have been a lot of extra, unnecessary mental efforts and superstitions in my head.

I feel that old strain now, just imagining that old lifestyle of believing all success and failure rests upon my inner energies.

As a mighty deliberate creator, I would have either waited until I felt aligned to make that call, or I would have deliberately worked up a feeling of alignment prior to calling.  After all, Abraham-Hicks says, “Nothing is more important than that you feel good,” and “Get aligned, and then.”  I feel that old strain now, just imagining that old lifestyle of believing all success and failure rests upon my inner energies.  I was always directing and conjuring thoughts and moods.  Non-aligned action was a big no-no.

If I made this call to my internet provider in my Abrahaze, I would have found it necessary to saddle myself with extra responsibilities like visualization or positive self-talk or reaching for belief.  If I received the same deal, it would have been a huge, gratifying hit, “proof” of the good work I had done with my thoughts and emotions, and “proof” of Abraham-Hicks and the Law of Attraction.  Then I would have tried to milk that feeling of success as long as I could to stay in alignment. I’m exhausted even thinking about the way I used to live.  At the time, I couldn’t see how forced and depleting it was.

Take Normal Action

Does every action require some sort of fancy alignment?  Of course not!  Keep it simple. If you need to call your internet provider to negotiate a better deal, call your internet provider and negotiate a better deal. Do the necessary reality things for this task.

My attitude when I made the call could best be summed up as:  “Uuggh, I don’t wanna.”  That is a terrible mindset, from a Law of Attraction perspective.  But when it comes to actual reality, there is no need to have goals about feeling perfect.  Skip the inner work and take the appropriate actions.  In this case, have your account number ready.  Be armed with a little awareness about your current plan versus the deals that are out there.  Maybe look up the direct number for the loyalty and retention department to avoid more time on the phone being transferred.  Oh, and please remember to be courteous to the customer service representative.

It is a waste of time and effort to go about life attempting to influence events with mind control, which is essentially what Law of Attraction philosophies are about.  In fact, living a misunderstanding of how the world works will eventually lead a person further into superstition and further away from powerful action.  Overemphasis on inner feelings to create perfect circumstances will undercut a person’s power to accomplish things out in the world.

In my internet provider scenario, what is it that helped me much more than striving for internal alignment?  Clear, honest communication: “That sounds like a good deal, but I don’t need the highest plan.”  “Five dollars off for 3 months is not quite what I’m looking for.”  “This third party internet provider charges $45 a month for the same service.” I could have done the same thing using a Law of Attraction spin every step of the way in an attempt to feel more in control, but this conversation only required me to voice my needs and concerns and communicate respectfully with another human being.  It did not require me to attain and harness perfect internal energies for some matching manifestation.

Why Law of Attraction Teachings Are So Comforting

Magical thinking can help a person to feel in control when in an uncomfortable or uncertain situation.  It is something to reach for to feel powerful instead of feeling insecure.  And you may have noticed, it doesn’t take that much to trigger a feeling of insecurity.  From making a phone call to asking for something you want to going to work in the morning to having relationships with other people, insecurity happens.

Being given mental and emotional busy-work via Law of Attraction teachings can do a lot to soothe this.  Like a pre-game ritual to win the big game, Law of Attraction techniques can be used as the ultimate ritual to reach for, giving people a way to feel powerful and in control.

Law of Attraction teachings tell people they can avoid vulnerability through reaching for inflated states.  It is not a path to being one’s best self, but to being superhuman, which isn’t wise or even possible and creates tension over time.  It’s important to be empowered, but also wise and reasonable to be OK with vulnerability and occasional human discomfort as par for the course here on Earth.

Leaving Old Habits Behind

After turning away from Law of Attraction teachings as a way of life, the habit of waiting for aligned action stayed with me in subtle ways.  A bad day might cause me to superstitiously wonder what I was doing to “attract” the circumstances.  Sometimes this can be a useful question for reflection when it comes to ongoing life patterns.  But otherwise, bad days happen.  Sometimes things go wrong, and sometimes people are unpleasant.  It’s not life without that stuff, and trying to control everyday life experiences through mental power (or constantly wondering, “what is it about ME that is causing THIS?”) is a giant waste of time.

Living a misunderstanding of how the world works will eventually lead a person further into superstition and further away from powerful action.

After Law of Attraction teachings, I also found it harder to take steps forward into unknown territory if I wasn’t feeling quite confident yet.  Launching a business, meeting with clients, doing new sessions–I wanted to feel perfect before moving forward.  I would give more significance than necessary to my uncomfortable feelings.  Feeling nervous and vulnerable is normal and expected in new situations, not, in fact, a cue to stop and initiate a round of positive affirmations so that life will go your way.  It is a curse to believe that perfect feeling must be achieved before doing anything.

Obviously, it is more comfortable to feel perfectly good and perfectly in control.  And obviously, we do need to pay attention to our thoughts and emotions.  But striving for alignment could also be called striving for perfection.  Law of Attraction philosophies have people striving for perfect actions and outcomes by way of perfect internal states, and this handicapped me more than it helped me.

Thanks for reading! Comments and discussion are welcome.

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7 thoughts on “No Law of Attraction Mindset Necessary

  1. Thank you for this site – it’s important. I wouldn’t know where to begin in my response. And this merits a big response! I have had serious misgivings about LOA teaching for some time. I dabbled in the Esther/Abraham Hicks teachings for a while and initially it chimed with me but there were always big disparities. I’d like to draw your attention to this article –

    1. Thank you for your comment here and the appreciation expressed. It makes a difference to have your voice here, representing yet another person who sees beyond the craze.

      Thanks for sharing that article. It is now posted on my Links page as well. This may be the first one I’ve read highlighting the potential harm for those who are vulnerable due to mental health difficulties.

      I browsed through a few differing opinions in the comment section on the article, and it’s unfortunate that some people will default to “you aren’t getting it” instead of being able to reasonably consider the fact that belief systems can cause harm.

  2. Thank you – I am glad to have contributed. The comments in the comments section are shocking but they do not matter because the article outlines issues which are a cause for concern very pertinently.

  3. I’m so glad to have found your website. I followed Abraham for some time and I also found Teal Swan who I followed closely, who actually seems to take a lot of her material from Abraham/Jerry and Esther Hicks. She’s a dangerous person as well. I followed her closely, but I’m glad I didn’t get in too deep unlike some. I think to some degree it helped me in the short term, but like you said I think it was magical thinking, and it never really helped me get to the core of my own issues. I also wasted quite a bit of money on books and other LoA or new age merchandise. I do look at it as a lesson, but definitely not an easy one. I’ve been dealing with some pretty bad depression after realizing that these teachings are flawed and that the new age movement is fraught with greed and materialism. The disillusionment turned everything upside down and I had no idea what to believe in anymore. I’ve explored shamanism, gnosticism, and progressive Christianity, a bit since then, but I still don’t have any rigid belief system at all.

    1. I appreciate your comments here and on the other blog post. It is going to help a lot of people to read various experiences of people waking up, including the uncomfortable parts like feeling lost and depressed afterwards.

      It’s true, it’s not an easy lesson. Although I have mourned the years of wasted time and being misguided, as time goes on there are more gifts that are revealed. And that’s what ultimately remains. I hope you and others will also find yourself sharpened, wiser, and prepared for even deeper growth, maybe to a level that couldn’t have been reached without first embracing and then moving on from a variety of ideologies.

      And luckily, the painful disillusionment is just one stage, and it won’t last forever. Seize this time to detox, to rest, and to rehabilitate your thinking and your life. You may want to check out my Links page as you sort through the aftermath. In particular, I would like to call attention to Izabella Siodmak’s book, The Lie of Attraction. You can get her book here:

  4. I`ve never become a part of the whole ‘Hicks’ circus. It sounds very exhausting and demanding amongst other things! It does seem to me there is a massive market in LoA. I mean LoA in its self is what it is.(or isn`t depending on your view!).There are however always some greedy people who will use anything to exploit unsuspecting innocents. These con people will lie and basically do what it takes to get what they want . Money and power being the main objectives..In my opinion this Hicks woman one of these dispicable people . She is so obviously fake. I really wish someone would totally expose her . (David Stone has writen a book about the Hicks)

    I would go as far as saying that Hicks has become a cult . I think some ‘Abers’ show definate signs of brainwashing The daily repetitions,use of hypnosis also using words or language particular to that group are all classic mind control tecniques. At the very least the ‘Abers’ I have come across seem to be addicted to listening to the Hicks material……………. all very unhealthy.

    I personaly think it is good to be a ‘seeker’.but keep an open mind … realise we all have the answers inside ourselves.We don`t need other peoples thoughts and theories … Keep free…safe from exploitation from rigid belief systems and dogma……………….BE WHO YOU TRULY ARE ………

    1. Great comment, Ali. I could have used some of your street smarts many years ago. The open-heartedness and earnestness of many spiritual seekers and idealists can be easily taken advantage of, unfortunately. I would like people to be able to retain their optimism and openness without forsaking discernment and leaving themselves open to exploitation.

      I think exploring Abraham-Hicks as a cult (or cult-like group) is such an interesting topic. Thanks for your thoughts on that. And yes, the dependence on the material is rampant among dedicated Abers, and not something that is seen as the least bit concerning (though should be) when one is deep in it. It’s really a marvel to be fooled into thinking you’re basically enlightened when in fact you’ve actually lost individual thought and mental freedom while following someone else’s dogma to the letter.

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