No Law of Attraction Mindset Necessary

No Law of Attraction Mindset Necessary

I had been meaning to call my internet provider. The last deal they gave me ended months ago. I didn’t like that my bill was back up to more than $70 a month for almost the lowest internet package available.

I needed to call and re-negotiate another deal. But I was putting it off.

Negotiating is not my comfortable place. It is quite the opposite. But I finally called my provider, and after some back and forth with the customer service rep, I ended up with double the internet speed for less money. The offer even lasts for a year rather than expiring after 3 months like usual.

The deal was much better than anything I was expecting. I was pleasantly surprised and pretty excited about the outcome. This event caused me to reflect on how I would have interpreted and handled this same event if I were still an avid Law of Attraction fan.

Strive for Aligned Action?

This would have gone quite differently if I were still in my Law of Attraction Abrahaze (Abraham-Hicks haze). The results would likely have been the same, but the whole process would have come with extra, unnecessary mental efforts and superstitions.

I feel that old strain now, just imagining that old lifestyle of believing all success and failure rests upon my inner energies.

First, as a mighty deliberate creator attempting to follow Law of Attraction rules, I would have either waited until I felt aligned to make that call, or I would have deliberately worked up a feeling of alignment prior to calling.

After all, Abraham-Hicks says, “Nothing is more important than that you feel good,” and “Get aligned, and then.

I feel that old strain now, just imagining that old lifestyle of believing all success and failure rests upon my inner energies. I was always directing and conjuring thoughts and moods. Non-aligned action was a big no-no, so even making a simple phone call could lead to “But I’m not aligned enough” anxiety.

If I made this call to my internet provider in my Abrahaze, I would have found it necessary to saddle myself with extra responsibilities. I would be adding in visualization or positive self-talk or reaching for belief. Had I received a poor deal, I would have determined that I wasn’t in positive alignment. But if I received the same great deal, it would have been a huge, gratifying hit.

A pleasing outcome would become proof of the good work I had done with my thoughts and emotions—proof that Law of Attraction works exactly as I was told.

Afterward, I would have tried to milk that feeling of success as long as I could—another common Law of Attraction practice—in order to build more positive momentum that would attract more positive manifestations.

I’m exhausted even thinking about the way I used to live. At the time, I couldn’t see how forced and depleting it was.

Just Take Normal Action

Does every action require some sort of fancy alignment?

The answer is no. Of course not.

This is easy for most people to understand, but it breaks a cardinal Law of Attraction rule ingrained deeply in the brains of followers.

My attitude when I made the call could best be summed up as: “Uuggh, I don’t wanna.” From a Law of Attraction perspective, this is a sort of forbidden mindset to take action from, because it is believed that privately feeling this way incurs actual real world consequences.

But your inner world of thoughts and feelings is just that: YOUR inner world.

When it comes to actual reality, there is no need to strive for feeling perfect. Keep it simple. Skip the excessive emotional work. Skip the need to stamp out every so-called impurity in your thoughts. And simply… act.

If you need to call your internet provider to negotiate a better deal, call your internet provider and negotiate a better deal. Do the necessary steps for this task.

It is a waste of time and effort to go about life attempting to influence events with mind control, which is essentially what Law of Attraction philosophies are about.

In fact, living a misunderstanding of how the world works will eventually lead a person further into superstition and further away from powerful action. Overemphasis on inner feelings to create perfect circumstances will undercut a person’s power to accomplish things out in the world.

In my internet provider scenario, what helped me far more than striving for internal alignment? Clear and direct communication.

  • “That sounds like a good deal, but that’s not the plan I’m interested in.”
  • “Five dollars off for 3 months is not the kind of deal I’m looking for.”
  • “Provider X charges less for the same service.”

I can do this while feeling grumpy or happy. I can do this while feeling insecure or confident. Or I can do this using a Law of Attraction spin in an attempt to feel more in control. But this conversation did not require Law of Attraction exercises. It did not require me to attain and harness perfect internal energies for some positive manifestation.

It only required me to voice my needs and concerns and communicate clearly with another human being.

Why Law of Attraction Teachings Are So Comforting

Magical thinking can help a person feel in control when in an uncomfortable or uncertain situation. It is something to reach for to feel powerful instead of feeling insecure. And you may have noticed, it doesn’t take that much to trigger a feeling of insecurity.

From making a phone call to asking for something you want to going to work in the morning to having relationships with other people, insecurity happens.

Staying engaged in mental and emotional busy-work via Law of Attraction teachings can do a lot to soothe the insecurities that arise in life. Like a pre-game ritual to win the big game, people can reach for Law of Attraction superstitions to increase their feelings of personal power and control.

Law of Attraction teachings tell people they can avoid vulnerability and uncertain outcomes through inflating their mental and emotional states. It is not a reasonable path to becoming one’s best self; it is a fantasy path to trying to become superhuman.

Aiming for superhuman control is not a useful or attainable goal. This will weave an unnecessary web of tension and hyper vigilance inside the follower over time.

Old Habits Die Hard

After turning away from Law of Attraction teachings as a way of life, the habit of stopping for inner perfection stayed with me in subtle ways.

There was a program within me that continued to give more significance than necessary to uncomfortable feelings. On some level, I was still frightened to take steps forward into unknown territory if I wasn’t feeling totally confident—and who does feel totally confident when pushing their comfort zone?

Instead of accepting my normal and human feelings of vulnerability, I was still programmed to be hyper-tuned to my world of feelings over the world of actions.

Feeling nervous or uncertain is not a cue to stop and initiate a round of positive affirmations. It is a curse to believe that perfect feeling must be achieved before doing anything.

I also carried superstitions that were hard to put to rest. Even after giving up Law of Attraction teachings, a bad day could still cause me to wonder what I was doing internally to bring myself the unpleasant circumstances.

Living a misunderstanding of how the world works will eventually lead a person further into superstition and further away from powerful action.

Asking “what’s my part in this?” can be a useful reflection question when it comes to ongoing life patterns. But otherwise, bad days happen. Sometimes things go wrong. Sometimes people are unpleasant. These aren’t indicators that you must retreat into yourself and conjure up a nicer world through thought-magic.

This is just life, and trying to control everyday life experiences through mental power (or constantly seeking the link between something you thought in your head and something that occurred in the real world) is a giant waste of time.

Wisdom Over Perfection

Obviously, we’d all rather feel good. We’d all rather feel in control. And of course we need to pay attention to our thoughts and emotions.

But Law of Attraction philosophies have people striving for an impossible, superhuman endeavor: perfect actions and perfect outcomes via perfect internal states. Requiring perfection before acting makes one nervous and brittle and unable to be effective under all conditions.

I’d recommend wisdom instead, particularly the wisdom to find ease with the ups and downs of life and the ups and downs of your own humanity.

Have the wisdom to understand that discomfort doesn’t mean something bad is happening, nor does it mean we must stop and artificially chase out vulnerability. Wisdom means we understand that discomfort is par for the course. The key is simply to notice the discomfort… then proceed anyway.

Feel uncomfortable, and make the call anyway, start the project anyway, go on the date anyway. Rehabilitate your mind to understand that we gain the results we want, not through magical thoughts and moods, but through mastering effective action regardless of how we feel.

7 thoughts on “No Law of Attraction Mindset Necessary

  1. Thank you for this site – it’s important. I wouldn’t know where to begin in my response. And this merits a big response! I have had serious misgivings about LOA teaching for some time. I dabbled in the Esther/Abraham Hicks teachings for a while and initially it chimed with me but there were always big disparities. I’d like to draw your attention to this article – http://www.care2.com/causes/why-the-self-help-law-of-attraction-is-dangerous-for-our-mental-health.html

    1. Thank you for your comment here and the appreciation expressed. It makes a difference to have your voice here, representing yet another person who sees beyond the craze.

      Thanks for sharing that article. It is now posted on my Links page as well. This may be the first one I’ve read highlighting the potential harm for those who are vulnerable due to mental health difficulties.

      I browsed through a few differing opinions in the comment section on the article, and it’s unfortunate that some people will default to “you aren’t getting it” instead of being able to reasonably consider the fact that belief systems can cause harm.

  2. Thank you – I am glad to have contributed. The comments in the comments section are shocking but they do not matter because the article outlines issues which are a cause for concern very pertinently.

  3. I’m so glad to have found your website. I followed Abraham for some time and I also found Teal Swan who I followed closely, who actually seems to take a lot of her material from Abraham/Jerry and Esther Hicks. She’s a dangerous person as well. I followed her closely, but I’m glad I didn’t get in too deep unlike some. I think to some degree it helped me in the short term, but like you said I think it was magical thinking, and it never really helped me get to the core of my own issues. I also wasted quite a bit of money on books and other LoA or new age merchandise. I do look at it as a lesson, but definitely not an easy one. I’ve been dealing with some pretty bad depression after realizing that these teachings are flawed and that the new age movement is fraught with greed and materialism. The disillusionment turned everything upside down and I had no idea what to believe in anymore. I’ve explored shamanism, gnosticism, and progressive Christianity, a bit since then, but I still don’t have any rigid belief system at all.

    1. I appreciate your comments here and on the other blog post. It is going to help a lot of people to read various experiences of people waking up, including the uncomfortable parts like feeling lost and depressed afterwards.

      It’s true, it’s not an easy lesson. Although I have mourned the years of wasted time and being misguided, as time goes on there are more gifts that are revealed. And that’s what ultimately remains. I hope you and others will also find yourself sharpened, wiser, and prepared for even deeper growth, maybe to a level that couldn’t have been reached without first embracing and then moving on from a variety of ideologies.

      And luckily, the painful disillusionment is just one stage, and it won’t last forever. Seize this time to detox, to rest, and to rehabilitate your thinking and your life. You may want to check out my Links page as you sort through the aftermath. In particular, I would like to call attention to Izabella Siodmak’s book, The Lie of Attraction. You can get her book here: http://lieofattraction.com/

  4. I`ve never become a part of the whole ‘Hicks’ circus. It sounds very exhausting and demanding amongst other things! It does seem to me there is a massive market in LoA. I mean LoA in its self is what it is.(or isn`t depending on your view!).There are however always some greedy people who will use anything to exploit unsuspecting innocents. These con people will lie and basically do what it takes to get what they want . Money and power being the main objectives..In my opinion this Hicks woman one of these dispicable people . She is so obviously fake. I really wish someone would totally expose her . (David Stone has writen a book about the Hicks)

    I would go as far as saying that Hicks has become a cult . I think some ‘Abers’ show definate signs of brainwashing The daily repetitions,use of hypnosis also using words or language particular to that group are all classic mind control tecniques. At the very least the ‘Abers’ I have come across seem to be addicted to listening to the Hicks material……………. all very unhealthy.

    I personaly think it is good to be a ‘seeker’.but keep an open mind … realise we all have the answers inside ourselves.We don`t need other peoples thoughts and theories … Keep free…safe from exploitation from rigid belief systems and dogma……………….BE WHO YOU TRULY ARE ………

    1. Great comment, Ali. I could have used some of your street smarts many years ago. The open-heartedness and earnestness of many spiritual seekers and idealists can be easily taken advantage of, unfortunately. I would like people to be able to retain their optimism and openness without forsaking discernment and leaving themselves open to exploitation.

      I think exploring Abraham-Hicks as a cult (or cult-like group) is such an interesting topic. Thanks for your thoughts on that. And yes, the dependence on the material is rampant among dedicated Abers, and not something that is seen as the least bit concerning (though should be) when one is deep in it. It’s really a marvel to be fooled into thinking you’re basically enlightened when in fact you’ve actually lost individual thought and mental freedom while following someone else’s dogma to the letter.

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